Thursday, 27 January 2011

The Problem with the word "beauty"

I'm going to be honest with you guys, because a lot of you have been with me for some time. But, I have to confess that I've been feeling quite negative towards this blog for quite a while. It's not hat I don't like writing it, because I really do. I just feel a little...hmm, fake. Let me explain...

I often read other people's beauty blogs, and watch videos on YouTube, and I look at how pretty and attractive most of these other women are, and I feel quite inadequate at times. Being a larger person, there are a lot of things that I can't do. I can't, for example, talk about an actress' style, because I couldn't replicate it on myself, because I don't have the body shape. And I often find myself thinking that I'm not pretty enough to be writing a blog about beauty, because 99% of modern society probably wouldn't class me as a physically beautiful person. And, in that sense, I feel quite fake.

But then I have to sit down and realise that "beauty" isn't about being the perfect size, the perfect figure, with the perfect face shape etc etc, because when you delve deeper, you quickly realise that these girls that I consider to be a million times more attractive than me don't necessarily consider themselves to be as pretty as I consider them to be. They have hang-ups, just like I do. They have crooked teeth, imperfections on the skin, wonky noses and they still write about all this stuff.

I guess the moral of this story is, that I realised, that I have to keep writing this blog, because there are other young women, just like me, that are constantly being made to feel inadequate because they don't fit into this stereotype, or into that Size 4 dress! Who get questioned why they wear makeup, because they still look ugly. The answer to which is that we don't wear makeup so that you'll think we're pretty, we do it for ourselves, to boost that confidence a little. We do it so that we can accept ourselves, not so that you'll accept us (although it does sometimes help to feel accepted).

The whole "beauty is only skin deep" is of course a big cliche, but quite often, the really beautiful people are not the ones with the seemingly perfect skin, but the ones that admit their flawed, accept their imperfections, but refuse to hide away from them.

I've spent too much of my life, wasted, because other people made me feel bad about my large forehead, how thin my hair is, and even my weight. But, you know what, I do have issues with all of those things, but they're my issues, and they make me who I am. I'm not necessarily proud with my weight, but if I was the person that I thought I wanted to be, I don't think that I'd be where I am today. And here's a little secret, I am VERY happy with where I am today (although I'd like to be earning more money ;))



  1. This rings a bell with me. I am a million miles away from the gorgeous girls on youtube/ other blogs. In fact I am properly fugly lol but you know what? I love makeup and my opinion on it is just as valid as any body elses. I love writing about beauty and the products that help me feel good about myself. At the end of the day the only people who need to think I'm attractive are my husband and myself. He says I am and I feel I'm getting there so that's good enough for me!

    Sorry for the rambling comment lol. Fab post :-) I think you're gorgeous x

  2. @Eyelining You are *not* fugly! Outrageous comments!
    Kat, I too am blessed with a giant forehead which was the subject of muchos ridicule at school. So much so, that I ended up getting a fringe just to hide it. Ironically, the same young man responsible for most of this ridicule turned out to be rather eager to get in my pants... I won't go into detail! It was a case of playground tactics in the end. I like to think my giant forehead houses my giant brains anyway :)
    Don't judge yourself too harshly because I can almost guarantee that you're the only one doing it. No one else ever thinks as badly of yourself as you can. We're our own worst critics! :) xx

  3. @Eyelining - Thanks for the comments, the fact that you think you're "fugly" proves my point perfectly.

    Personally, I think real beauty is in the girls who are truly pretty (but not without imperfection), but honestly can not see how beautiful they are!

    @LittleMissH - I had a fringe cut in during school as well, for that exact reason. I honestly hope the boy who mocked my large forehead didn't fancy me...that would just be creepy! Although, I did have my suspicions, when he randomly stood up for me against one of his mates...*shudder* LOL

  4. I write a beauty blog, Colin's Beauty Pages, and I am a podgy fifty year old bloke who is just starting to going bald. I definitely don't correspond to Greek principles of ideal beauty. So no matter what you look like you aren't the most unappealing beauty blogger around.

    I read your blog because you have something to say. Please keep it up.

    A great many young women are trying way to hard to match imaginary air brushed glamourous pictures of stars who without a team of make up artists and skilled photographers would not stand out from the crowd. It is more important to feel comfortable with who you are.


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